My youngest often wakes up early in the morning… you know that tricky hour of the day when it isn’t yet time for anyone to be awake but yet close enough to morning that if you let him cry it out a bit they’ll probably wake up and it’s way earlier than you want more than one child up seeing as it’s earlier than you even want to be up. You know that time of the night/morning?
So, when this happens, I grab my lil man and bring him into bed. He is my snuggler. And by snuggler, I mean, wrap his sweet lil arms around your neck and lay his head on your chest and fall asleep. Or, sit beside you and lay his head on top of your face and fall asleep. Sometimes he’ll lay snuggled in the middle of us with one or both of us putting our arm around him.
This of course means that we almost always end up staying in bed longer than we originally planned. Because if your already not an early riser by nature, think of how much harder it is to get up with your sweet lil baby sleeping on top of you.
Sometimes, however, there is not choice but to risk disrupting him and get out of bed. And when that happens I always, always find myself thinking of that episode of Friends where Chandler Bing learns Ross’s “Hug and Roll technique”.
I am convinced that some of the best bonding between my kids takes place after we kiss them goodnight and shut the door. The policy in our house has been that they can talk in bed (or in their drawers) as long as they are quiet and stay laying down. (no jumping off the bed or playing with toys) The giggles and chattering drifting down the hall are some of my most cherished sounds. In fact, it was during one of these “behind closed doors chats” that my son led his younger sister to the Lord. She told me one day that she knew she was a Christian because she had prayed with her brother one night asking God to forgive her of her sins and be her Savior.
So, naturally, when my oldest son moved out of the room he’d shared with his sisters for 4 years in order to share a room with his little brother, it was a bittersweet moment at the circus.
But, I think in the past year since that happened the bond of friendship between the girls has grown. AND a genuine love of reading has transpired in my oldest sons life, as well, as a unique bond of brotherhood between the boys.
When he moved into his brothers room, we knew the late night talking would cease for awhile. But, we told him, you may stay up and read in your bed. I had no idea at the time the hours of reading that would transpire with this new arrangement. It is not unusual for me to have to go back and tell him lights out at 11:00. In fact last Friday, he was beyond excited because he had managed to stay up until midnight!
It’s a cute little arrangement that has taken place. My youngest will contentedly lay in his crib falling asleep watching his big brother reading. It doesn’t bother him to have the light on, or to fall asleep with someone else in the room. In fact, I dare you to try to put him to sleep at night without his brother there.
Last night we told the kids to get ready for bed and we went down the hall to find this.
He sat there so quietly, so contently that we ended up leaving him there for awhile before going back and moving him to his crib.
When I was taking my Elem Education classes in college, I learned that reading in front of your children is crucial to develop a life long love of reading. They need to see that you too enjoy reading and it just isn’t something you do because you have to. I can only imagine growing up watching his big brother read for hours every night, will have a similarly positive effect on him.
While we didn’t plan it like this at first, Sunday ended up being date day for each of our 4 kids. Each child ended up with some one on one time with either mom, dad, or Aunt Karen. Good times had by all!
One of the duties of our church deacons is to unlock the church on Sunday mornings. When Scott became a deacon 3 years ago, he started taking one child with him on his deacon duty mornings. This served a dual or maybe even triple purpose. 1. it got him some one on one time with one of the kids 2. it allowed the kids to participate in serving the church alongside him (rather than serving at church being something that took Daddy away from the fam) and 3. it left me with one left kid to get ready for church Sunday morning. The kids LOVE when it is their turn for deacon duty with Daddy. They love unlocking their SS classrooms, turning on the lights, and turning on the heat in each room. They also enjoy watching the worship team practice and probably most of all, they love having Daddy to themselves for a few hours on Sunday morning. This Sunday it was our 4 year olds turn and her face lit up when Daddy asked her on her date. (they also LOVE getting to ride in Daddy’s car and put the windows down!)
This Sunday after church Aunt Karen took our 6 year old out for a belated birthday date at the mall. They went to lunch, went shopping for a new pair of earrings, and even got some dessert afterwards. She was so excited the night before when Aunt Karen told her to wear something nice and they would go to the mall to pick out her birthday gift. I was so excited that they were able to have some one on one time together. I love that Aunt Karen wants to take an active role in my kids lives.
Meanwhile…since we already had 2 cars at church, I took our oldest son out to Starbucks for a Mother/Son Cub Scout date. He only had a few more requirements left to complete in order to earn his Wolf Badge. These involved discussing a few hypothetical situations and how he would and should respond in each scenario. I thought it might be more fun to complete the questions on a Starbucks date…things didn’t work out the evening I planned to go out with him and the banquet is next weekend, so Sunday afternoon was a must! After our trip to Starbucks, we visited the library to pick out some more books for him to read. A perfect afternoon date if you ask me!
Every Sunday evening is Daddy date time for our youngest. I take the older three to evening church for catechism class. Since I teach one of the classes, I stay there with them. This affords Scott some rare one on one time with the lil guy. Scott has always appreciated this time on Sunday evenings…. when I first started 4 years ago it was his Daddy/girl time while the oldest and I went to class. He really does treasure a few hours on Sunday evening to play with the youngest of the crew while everyone else is away.
We don’t have a set schedule for who gets one on one time with whom when. It doesn’t happen on a set rotation each month. (other than keeping track of who is up next for deacon duty) But, when we can we try to seize the opportunity for a little one on one time with each kid… to see their personalities apart from the rest, to listen to just them, and to foster our relationships with them as individuals. This Sunday was a rare opportunity for each child to enjoy some time in the lime light.
More times than not, when I peek in on my girls before heading to bed, I find them sleeping together.
Sometimes this means they are both down on the bottom bunk.
Sometimes, it means they are side by side in their drawers (truthfully I find them like this almost as often as I find them in the bottom bunk).
Sometimes they are both on the floor. (haven’t found them like that in the last 2 weeks)
And once, last week, I even found them side by side in the same drawer.
As I peek in on them snuggled up together, it gives me hope that as they grow, they’ll share secrets, slumber parties, and hopefully a life long friendship, side by side….
I think 4 is a great age for a lot of reasons… one of which is the funny little things 4 year olds say…
Today we were walking to the van and she was carrying her coat, Kit, and her baby. I said, “If you wear your coat you’ll have more hands.” to which she said, “No, Mom, I’ll still only have 2 hands.”
Last week before she went into her gymnastics class I told her to work hard and have fun. “Oh Mom, that won’t be a problem at all… when I’m doing my back hip circle and I swing back from the bar and flip around, it’s just like I am flying through the air.” The look of pure joy on her face as she described flying through the air is one I want to remember forever.
A few weeks ago I served split pea soup for dinner. While my husband and sons both enjoyed it, my girls did not. AT ALL. I suppose somewhere during the dinner I said something about how I worked hard to make that meal for them and I didn’t appreciate their disgusted faces and comments about the food. And I suppose it sunk in a little even though they didn’t really eat it all that well. Because a whole week later out of the blue she says to me, “Mom, remember when you made that soup last week that I didn’t like?” “Well, it wasn’t that I didn’t like that you made it for me, it’s just that when it was in my mouth… pause… well…. when it was in my mouth it just made me feel like I had to cough.” (essentially she said, “Mom it’s not that I didn’t appreciate your cooking me food, it’s just your food made me want to gag).
Seriously, I love this girl and am not at all eager for her to grow up anytime soon.
This afternoon my smiley, mild mannered, easy going baby suddenly channeled his inner Dennis the Menace and went all toddler boy on me for 30 minutes.
First I looked over and found him standing on his tool bench (oops look who forgot to put away the advent calendar with her Christmas decorations)
I got him down and shortly after realized things had been mighty quiet for awhile and went searching for him. Found him in the master bathroom STANDING on the toilet.
After shutting all the doors in the hallway we headed back out to the kitchen/living room. He attempted to get water from the fridge dispenser but thankfully it was locked. So, instead he opted for emptying my clean dishes from the dish washer into the dog bowl.
I didn’t get them out right away b/c I figured the harm had already been done, and I would go ahead and finish emptying the dishwasher before he got into more mischief.
But, that plan was thwarted when he then decided to DRINK FROM THE DOG BOWL! While I moved the bowl onto the counter and the dirty cups into the sink, I turn around to find him standing in the dishwasher reaching for my leftover pizza from lunch.
At this point, I decide that this has TRULY BEEN THE CRAZIEST HALF HOUR OF HIS LIFE and strap him into his booster seat with my pizza in hopes of keeping him safe and me sane!
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Meet the MC
My roles as wife, homemaker and mother of 4 feel much like a circus with 3 rings constantly vying for my attention. Life is often chaotic but I'm loving every minute and wouldn't want it any other way. Sit back, relax and enjoy the show. I won't let you miss a thing.
